Ugliest federal judicial truck contest

A career law clerk to one of the magistrate judges told me yesterday that my posts on toilets were beginning to trouble him on a deep and psychic level.  He asked me to blog about something else.  That got me thinking.

RGK's 1991 truck.  Blotches are from RGK's attempt to paint over rust.  Bed entirely rusted through at the gate.  On weekends, when RGK doesn't shave, soccer moms are truly frightened when RGK rolls up next to them at the Wal-Mart.

My 1991 truck. Blotches are from my failed attempt to spray paint over rust.  On weekends, when I don’t shave, soccer moms and their children are frightened when I roll up next to their minivan at the Wal-Mart parking lot.  For fun, I sometimes lean out of the driver’s window and tell the little kids to give me their candy and they won’t be harmed, but then I quickly add, “just kiddin.'”

If I can’t blog about judicial toilets, maybe I can blog about ugly federal judicial trucks.  So, here is the deal, (1) if you are a federal judge or law clerk to a federal judge and you truly and regularly operate a really ugly truck, (2) send me a photo of it and (3) I will post the photo of the ugliest one on this blog.  You must identify yourself and submit to such probes as I think best to satisfy myself of your identity and position.

Bonus points are given for trucks that have gun racks.  Bonus points will also be given for monster trucks but they must be ugly and you must really drive the monster.  Low-riders, even though ugly, are likely to receive fewer points.

Lawyers and lay persons are not allowed to participate.  They are real people and as a result would have an unfair advantage over those of us who are more elevated.


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